I Know What You Want --
You Want A Walnut

Our last evening in Xi'an I wasn't feeling well, so I retired early. Rich and Brian ventured into the hotel bar to check out the boppy karoke band. The music was semi-western (a combination of bubblegum pop and show tunes) and there was actually an audience (mostly japanese, korean and nepalese businessmen) but something was amiss.

Xi'an: Karaoke like you've never heard before They figured it out quickly. The band was singing familiar western tunes, but fudging the words. "Quick," said Brian, "where's Mike?" They got him to come down to the bar. "What were you doing?"
Mike: "Waiting for something like this to happen."

A sampling of the evening's reinterpreted pop tunes. "Africa," by Toto:

"rising like a leopress over the Serengeti"
became
"rising like lepers over a sarin gate."

The winner of the evening, however was "You're The One" from the musical Grease:

"You're the one I want (You are the one I want)"
became
"I know what you want (You want a walnut)"

Eventually, Rich did a stint as lead singer, followed by a Korean lady who sang "Danny Boy", and suddenly it was karaoke night. After the performance, Rich also learned that one of the boppy girls (and I swear I'm not making this up) was named "Boots" and (surprise) they were desperate for new material. Rich promised to send them some. With lyrics.


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